


Naked stroll in the woods

by popayamorphaya



Category: The Order (TV 2019)
Genre: ;), Crushing, I can’t tag, M/M, Skinny Dipping, and comfortable showing his naked body, awkward alyssa, drunk randall, lilith and hamish tease them, naked, randall is way too confident, they also idiotas, they lost, they practically naked most the story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-25
Updated: 2019-03-25
Packaged: 2019-12-07 09:16:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18232922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/popayamorphaya/pseuds/popayamorphaya
Summary: The summary is in the tags ig?? i’m awkward but pls enjoy my story, it’s a humour? I think?





	Naked stroll in the woods

It was an early morning, the clouds painted the usually clear blue sky, a dull, cold grey. Randall was teaching Jack how to fully control his shifting, he’d learned how to but sometimes his wolf wasn’t compliant. Randall slowed down as Jack stood there naked in the wet forest having just shifted into human form, Randall doing the same just seconds later.

“What happened? You shifted back?” Randal asked as he stood there with his hands on his hips, baring all as Jack covered what he could with his hands awkwardly

“I didn’t mean to, did you leave any clothes out here for us?” Jack asked as he awkwardly averted his eyes away from Randall, he was trying his best not to look at him but it was kind of difficult not to.

“You think I just leave a trail of clothes everywhere in the forest, like this is my bedroom floor?”

“I don’t know..” Jack walked backwards behind a bush as to keep his ass covered too, bad idea though because Jack fell over a root sticking out and back into the mud leaving Randall in a fit of laughter, slapping his knee.

“What, it’s funny! And I assume you don’t want me to offer my help because you don’t want me to look so how else do I react?”  
Jack rolled his eyes as he struggled to get up without flashing Randall

“Where are we?” 

“I don’t know. Lost, I think? I don’t recall this place and we’re pretty deep in.”

“What! I can’t shift back, he’s refusing to listen to me!” Jack threw his hands in the air not even realising he’d just bared his goods to Randall and he quickly covered himself again as his whole body turned beet red.

“I don’t know why you’re so shy, you see me naked all the time.” He looked left, right, up and down to see if there was anything noticeable about the place but nada. 

“Yeah but you’re!” He paused “You know! Impressive!” At that Randall began to grin that way too cocky grin from ear to ear

“Well thank you m’love, I have seen you naked too though and trust me, you’ve got nothing to be ashamed of too.” He once again said all too casually as he began to walk in a random direction

“Where are you going?” Jack shouted having not moved, he took the moment to look at Randall’s ass.

“I don’t know, and watch you don’t burn a hole into my ass.” 

“I wasn’t— I was just looking at something else!” 

The two continued to walk through the woods and the entire time Jack had kept his hands over himself and he walked slowly behind Randall to make sure he couldn’t be seen. The clouds had slowly started to disappear as the chilly, daunting 6am turned into the lovely, bright and warm 8am all too quickly.

“What a beautiful morning, the sun is shining, the birds are chirping and it’s so hot too. Good day to be naked and lost i’m the woods!” 

“You always look at the bright side Randall. This isn’t a good situation, there’s nothing, we’re lost. I think we might be running round in circles, I mean I don’t get it! Forests can’t run for this many miles can they? We must be in another state at this point!” Jack groaned

“Look! A lake! I’m gonna go swim. We need a break, we haven’t stopped moving since we came here. Last night.” He emphasised

“You wanna go for a swim? Now?” Jack argued back

“Yes. You can sit there, awkwardly and quite frankly, terribly, covering your dick, orrrrr you can come in with me and give your arms a rest. Or you could try find your own way, make your way into a city and walk out naked in front of hundreds of people. Your choice bud!”

Jack gave in and when Randall was swimming away from his direction he quickly ran into the refreshingly cool water. It was nice and clean, surprising for any water given earths circumstances.

He didn’t really swim, he just stood and watched Randall swim around mostly. Of course Randall had now disappeared under the water now so god knows where he might be. That is until he feels a splash of cold hitting has back causing him to fall over.

“Randall! God damnit! Now I’m really wet!” 

“You’ve been staring at me naked all day, how much wetter could you really have gotten?” Randall teased back with a wink which caused Jack to blush wildly

After half an hour Randall began to get tired of swimming and made his way to the grass where he lay down and looked up at the few clouds that covered the sky

“Randall, what are you doing?”

“I’m tired, I think I could sleep.”

“Sleep? We’re in the middle of the fucking forest, you’re naked and the grass is wet!” 

“Barely, plus the sun is boiling so it’s cooling.”

“Randall! We need to get back! I’m tired of walking around with my hands over my junk!”

“Then don’t. Come sleep with me.” 

“I— I can’t with you right now. I’m gonna find my own way!” Jack said determined as he stomped away

“Jack! C’mon, you can’t wander in the forest alone, especially since you can’t shift properly yet!” Randall jogged up to him

“Get in front of me! I don’t want you seeing me naked!” Jack yelled back

They continued walking through the forest for a few hours, not even finding anything close to helpful. Jack was however sure he’d seen that tree before. Then Randall came to a halt and flung his arms in the air

“This is where I hid some clothes!” 

“Really? Finally! That must mean we’re close right?” 

“Yeah,” Randall ruffled in the hollow tree spot for clothes “but, my clothes are gone! What the hell? There’s just a damn hoodie and, a note?” Randall pulled the note out and read aloud “Have fun jamming your dick in the zip, loser! Kiss cuddle, kiss cuddle. Signed ‘Killith’”

“God damn! Just give me the hoodie!” Jack snatched the hoodie from Randall and hid behind a tree, he pulled the hoodie over him but paused before he zipped it, looking down at his dick “Maybe I’ll just wrap it around my waist..”

“Hey, I know where we are now. Come on!” 

Randall walked confidently to the house, not caring if anyone was watching while Jack looked around as he hid behind a tree and made a run for the door and quickly up to his room.

Randall walked in the house and headed straight for the shower. Once he was done he walked naked to the front entrance where they kept their robe and slippers for those times they were left naked. Randall whipped his head around as he heard the stairs creek and Jack walked down the stairs in his own robe.

“Hah, I see you got my message!” Lilith laughed from her sofa seat with a drink in her hand as she sipped with a menacing grin

“We got lost in the forest for hours, naked! I couldn’t shift back! Randall went swimming naked and then decided he would go for a nap on the damp grass! With his junk aired to the world! All I had was a hoodie to cover my waist!” Jack let out in frustration

“Lilith, you left them with nothing but a hoodie? Seriously. I thought I taught you better.” Hamish took a sip from his bourbon “Stop leaving them a hoodie. Give them a puffy pink dress, something embarrassing.”

“You’re right, damn I should’ve done that!” 

“I didn’t mind, it’s nice to walk around with no restricting clothes. Freeing. Maybe I should be a hippie and live on the land.” Randall pondered

“Wait, So you guys spent hours together... naked?” Hamish questioned which left Jack turning red again for the 10th time today

“Did things get sexy?” Lilith teased 

“Nah, he only flashed like twice. He kept his hands covering his dick the entire time. Which was literally from like sunrise to now, which is 1PM. Dude that’s so melodramatic, we’ve seen eachother naked.” At this Lilith had to spray her drink everywhere 

“You’ve hooked up?!” Lilith shouted “And you didn’t tell me, that’s cold Randall.”

“No we haven’t hooked up,” Randall clarified “Yet.” He nudged Jack with his arm and winked jokingly, except that just gave Jack a little hope.

“No! We won’t! And you’re straight anyways!” Randall let out a laugh as Hamish and Lilith took a sip of their drink rolling their eyes

“No I’m not!” He managed to let out in between laughs “I don’t know why your argument wasn’t ‘I’m straight though!’ because you actually are.”

“Uhm..” Jack let out a little high pitched “No.” 

“W- what?” Randall fumbled over his words and scratched the back of his neck “You- You’re not, uhm, straight?” He asekd a little to unsubtly 

“No. I’m bi, uh, I didn’t realise you liked guys either..” 

“Yup. Guys. Dicks. Ass. Nice.” Randall began listing a bunch of words “What the hell am I saying.” He whispered so only he could hear 

“Randall and Jack, in a tre—“ Randall slapped her arm and in retaliation she quickly threw her water over him. “Oops, I just reacted quickly. My bad.” She continued as she sipped on her alcohol, she wasn’t gonna waste her actual drink.

“You got my entire robe wet Lilith.” He took his robe off as it began to soak all the way through and he stood there naked, once again “I don’t have a spare robe, now what do I wear?” 

“First, Randall, we told you about getting naked. Second, clothes?” Hamish answered

“Ugh, clothes are too restricting. Robes are airy and free!” 

“Put some damn clothes on Randall!” Jack shouted 

“No. I’m gonna sit my naked ass on the sofa. Paybacks a bitch, Lilith.” He said as he did in fact, sit his naked ass on the sofa and lay a blanket over himself.

“GROSS! Hamish, tell him to stop!” 

“Randall, stop.” 

“No thanks, Liliths bitch.” 

“I’m not her bitch. I’m the leader of the Knights so I suggest you listen.” 

“I know you’re not gonna fight me over this so I don’t really know what you’ll do.”

Hamish leaned over and whispered into Randall’s ear “I know about that loose floorboard in your closet, and I know what you’re hiding.” 

“You know what. This sofa is uncomfy on my naked ass, I’m gonna go out and buy a new robe, bye!” 

“Randall, clothes first, you can’t go to the store naked!” Jack shouted as Randall headed for the door

“Right, gotcha!” He finger gunned Jack

A few hours later Randall came back, unable to walk straight with an entire pile of robes in his arms, piled so high his entire face was covered

“What the hell did you do?” Lilith questioned first

“Mmmm, I got me some robes Kilith! They so are comfy..” 

“You’re drunk.” Hamish walked over to Randall to guide him to the sofa “and shirtless?” 

“Yup!” He hiccuped “I went to the bar and,” another hiccup “Had some drinks. I also bought a takeaway! I think I lost it.”

“It’s in the car.” Alyssa said as she walked in the door 

“What are you doing here?” Jack asked a little bitterly

“I drove him home, I found him in the alley outside the bar hitting on a trashed cardboard cutout of Zac Efron..”

“Ahh. Zac Efrog. He’s such a nice guy. Did you know he’s a lifeguard?” Randall reminisced his encounter with Zac Efrog

“That was a movie..” 

“He saved me from drowning, I almost died!” 

“Oh my god. You’re high too?” Lilith asked

“A guy offered me a chocolate cigarette and I ate it. It didn’t taste like chocolate..” 

“That was weed. You ate weed.” Lilith stated

“Jackie, Jackie boy!” Randall blew, a failed attempt at whistling “Where are you?!” 

“Right next to you..” 

Randall looked to his side and lo and behold, there was Jack, sitting there with some of Randall’s robes on him. Randall, without any thought leaned over, quickly grabbed Jacks chin to face him and left a kiss on his lips

“Wha—“ 

“HAHA! DAMN!” Lilith yelled as she slapped her leg and began to burst into laughter. Hamish just took another drink and sighed before he complained about how long it had taken. Alyssa just stood there fidgeting with her pockets as she awkwardly avoided eye contact with Jack. Jack was just staring wide eyed at Randall with his mouth on the ground.

“Jack Morton, doth you taketh I, Randal Carpio-eth, as-eth, your boyfriend.. -eth?” 

“Uh.. maybe it’s time for bed.. someone help me take him upstairs?” But in return, Hamish, Lilith and Alyssa all said no at the exact same time and Jack let out a huff “Fine. Assholes.” He whispered that part under his breath 

He went to help Randall up the stairs but as he did Randall stood up and unbuckled his belt before he quickly pulled his jeans down to his feet and tried to walk to the bar for more drinks but he of course, tripped over his jeans and left Lilith bursting out into laughs for the hundredth time.

Jack was the only one who made a move to pick Randall up, everyone else just sat there awkwardly watching. “Pull your jeans up Randall.” Jack said looking away, clearly bored of every move Randall has made in the past 5 minutes. Obviously Randall ignored his instructions and pulled his jeans off his feet.

Jack put Randall’s arm around his shoulder as he helped the poor thing struggle to get up the stairs. They finally got to the top after a couple struggles and Randall shoved Jack off him lightly as he headed to his bedroom using the walls to keep himself standing. Jack followed to make sure Randall wouldn’t fall on the floor the second he got there.

Randall walked into his room and he stood over the bed, struggling to pull his t-shirt over his head and after a mighty struggle he finally managed, before he pulled his underwear down and stepped over them. Jacks face went red again as Randall crawled onto his bed and covered himself with the duvet.

“Night pumpkin’” Randall grumbled as Jack closed the curtains, not wanting the blinding light to hurt Randall’s hungover eyes in the morning.

The next morning Randall made his way downstairs to the smell of breakfast, it was like a cartoon where the characters smell the food and start floating towards it. He entered the kitchen to find Hamish making the Knights breakfast, as he did, being the over protective dad of them all. 

Hamish jumped and turned around when he heard Randall and he let out a sigh “You’re naked. Again. I counted your robes last night, you bought seventeen. Seventeen robes, Randall. What the hell do you need seventeen robes for?”

“My daddy says that life comes at you fast, we all like blades of grass—“ Randall starts singing

“What are you doing? Put one of your damn robes on!” 

“Damn. Sorraaaayyy. I was just singing seventeen by Alessia Cara, yeesh..” Randall said as he made his way to the living room and unwrapped one of his robes and wrapped it around himself and moaned “Damn this is so fluffy!” 

“Morning!” Jack said enthusiastically with wet hair

“How long have you been awake?” Hamish questioned as he began scraping the eggs off onto plates

“I went to replace all of the clothes Lilith kidnapped, so whenever you’re ready Randall, we can try shifting again! Also the bacon smells delicious Hamish. Thank you for making us all breakfast. You’re so great!” Randall and Hamish gave eachother a suspicious glare at Jacks suspiciously gleaming attitude

“What’s got you so happy, is this about last night?” Hamish teased and Jack just let out a small puff of laughter as his face stayed the exact same colour, which was weird, he also didn’t get defensive? Did they die?

“Nope! Just.. life, y’know?” To which Hamish replied with a no “Okay! My aunts coming to visit, I haven’t seen her in such a long time! I miss her and she’s always been like a mother to me. She’s also bringing my cousins. They were my best friends growing up. I miss them all so much. It’s just nice to have family that didn’t use me to get revenge. I know my grandpa loved me but he always had a shitty way of showing it, and he was so obsessed with revenge he became an unloving psychopath. God rest his soul obviously, but they’re so positive and loving and they show it.”

“Wait. This isn’t your evil grand magus’ fathers sister? Please don’t tell me we have to save the world from another evil?” Randall questioned as he horribly scraped his knife into the plate 

“No. I just said they were loving. I doubt that asshole even understood the concept of liking someone, let alone love and if he had a sister she’d probably be as starving for world domination as he was.” 

“So, are you gonna tell her you’re a werewolf too?” Hamish asked with a slight hint of bitterness again after Jack told his grandpa 

“Get over that! I snapped, accidents happen! And I’m not worried about that. Last time I saw her I wasn’t bisexual and I don’t know how she’ll react. She’s sweet and she never discriminated against anyone but I don’t know, it still leaves me a little anxious..” 

“Speaking of you liking dick, you didn’t answer my question last night.” Randall chomped down an entire piece of bacon at once, paired with a bit of egg.

“Stop eating like a pig! And what question?” 

“First, I’m the big bad wolf, I can swallow food whole, be grateful I’m chewing at all. I guess it’s a good quality I can handle all of that though isn’t it, I must be really good at sucking dick.” Randall pondered as he got an eye roll from Jack

“What question!” 

“Oh, right, I believe it was ‘Jack Morton, doth you taketh I, Randal Carpio, as-eth your boyfriend.. -eth?’ To be exact.”

“You remember that?!” 

“Yeah? Am I not supposed to?”

“Normally drunk AND high people don’t recall those memories..”

“I do, now answer.” He said taking in another whole piece of bacon 

“Uh, you were drunk.. AND high, I’m sure you didn’t mean it. You don’t have to ask me just because you feel awkward about taking it back..” Jack said in a disappointed voice 

“I meant it. If you don’t want to that’s fine.” Randall said taking down his third whole piece of bacon, chewing slower this time to hide the sadness in his face 

“Uhm, well, if you really meant it... then, yes. Only if you want to though?” By this point Hamish had left due to second hand embarrassment 

“Okay, I don’t wanna pressure you but you’re not being really clear, I can’t tell if you mean it or—“ he was interrupted by Jack grabbing his face and kissing him. He pulled back and they looked at eachother for a second 

“Yes, you dumbass!” Jack said enthusiastically

**Author's Note:**

> It might be shitty but I enjoyed writing it. I also didn’t reread it so there’s at least a good 10ish mistakes in there. Idk if I had made this a beginning note you could’ve played “find the dumbasses errors” anyways pls enjoy and i’m now realising pointless to throw in the end. I hope you enjoyed and thank you, don’t let people know you managed to get through this because they’ll see the torture you’re capable of withstanding and use it against you 😪😪 love u guys tho ❤️❤️❤️


End file.
